Friday, June 7, 2013

A Garden Gnome’s Revenge

A Garden Gnome's Revenge

Irked after being poked, prodded and stepped on by three-year olds and their grandmothers all morning, Garrick decided to retaliate.  Revenge was on the mind of this garden gnome and he was determined to make mischief.  He first knocked over some large decorated pots, the hideous ones from months ago that had been reduced to 50% and still weren’t selling.
“This will teach them,” He thought as the crash resonated through the Garden Center.  Employees came running from all directions as Garrick quietly slipped away. 
            For the next few hours Garrick placed handfuls of dirt in the purses of old women (the ones who spent fifteen minutes deciding which tray of marigolds to purchase made easy targets), tripped little kids running down the aisles (he discovered that the small ones flew farther than their larger siblings), re-set the sprinkler timer for every thirty seconds (the children actually enjoyed this prank) and randomly took five dollar bills out of the cash register (oh how he enjoyed watching the new employees squirm when they realized their drawer was short thirty dollars). 
            Exhausted, Garrick decided to take a nap among some geraniums.  As he slept an elderly woman approached his hiding place.
            “That one,” she exclaimed in a wavery voice, while rummaging through her dirt filled purse for her wallet.  “Oh my darling little pug, Pootsie, just loves these little elves, he chews on them all day!”
            Fortunately, Garrick doesn’t believe in karma.  Unfortunately for Garrick, neither does Pootsie.

Written by Courtney Denning, February 2006